Joy and Rest Between Christmas and Lent.

We’re in the time of year that I like to refer to as the most horrible time of the year. The time when the weather gets really cold and wet and miserable. The time of year where we realize the holidays are over, and we have to go back to normal life. The time of year when we can’t wait till Spring to get here already! If there was ever a time of year where we need to feel  joy, hope, peace, and love, this time of year is it! Its almost odd that this time of year feels this way, considering that a mere three weeks ago was what many refer to as the most wonderful time of the year. In fact, i feels downright wrong! Christmas is the time when we celebrate the birth, the first coming of Christ. Shouldn’t that Joy stay with us? Shouldn’t we put our mindset to “hooray! Jesus came to save us!” mode a little longer? Shouldn’t we reflect on this joy during this time?

So, what would it look like to keep the joy of Christmas through the winter months (up until Lent)? Well, one thing it would NOT look like is the Christmas season. Sure, all the parties and presents and hectic schedules and commitments of Christmas can be fun, but they are also very stressful. This brings me to the first thing that should happen during this season: We should REST! Rest our bodies, minds, souls – whatever. The Earth itself rests during the winter months, so why shouldn’t we? True, in this day and age, that’s all but impossible – we have jobs and commitments, and sometimes life just happens. I’m not saying quit your job or back out on a commitment . I am saying that perhaps taking a few days off if you can in late January / early February might not be a bad idea. Again, don’t do anything too stressful – just take off to the beach for a day or so, or maybe just stay at home and do the things you love to do. Whatever you do, it is essential to rest.

Resting is good for the soul, and its easy to be joyous when we’re well rested. But simply resting is not enough. We should also keep a positive attitude. True, we should always keep a positive attitude no matter what time of year it happens to be, but especially when we’re trying to keep a joyous mindset. Keeping a positive attitude includes avoiding those things which tend to get us in a negative mindset – everything from politics to music to movies to the news to relationships. Don’t get me wrong here; don’t close the door on your best friend if they’re having a hard time, and please keep in touch with what’s happening in the world and how you can help! Like I said, sometimes life happens – people loose jobs, get in accidents, earthquakes devastate countries. But don’t be overwhelmed by these things – don’t focus on all the bad that is happening around you and in the world. Rather focus on what you can do to help, whether its taking your friend out for a nice dinner and talking, or sending donations to those that are in need. There’s a lot of darkness in the world – but Jesus came to cast a light on the darkness, not to emphasize the darkness. Besides, what better way to keep a joyous demeanor, than to spread joy to others?

So what should worship look like in this time of keeping  a joyous attitude? I am not a very traditional person when it comes to traditions in faith- I pretty much believe in following what the spirit tells one to do, not just what tradition tells us. So perhaps I am not the best person to lay out a traditions for others to follow. Having said that, perhaps it would be in order to keep some (not all) Christmas Carols in rotation until the start of Lent. Songs such as “Joy to the world” or “O come let us adore him” have always given me a sense of such joy to sing, and its almost a shame to box them up for 9 months out of the year anyways. Like I mentioned earlier, this season of rest and joy should NOT be a repeat of Christmas, so there will be of course be Christmas songs totally inappropriate to this season. Don’t sing Rudolph or Frosty! Please! And again, we should have a positive focus during this time, so if a particular Christmas hymn brings about the feeling of dread and stress that often times accompanies Christmas, then do not sing that hymn.

Lent is never an easy season to face, for Lent is the time when one really observes how much they need to change. And Lent will be here soon. From the time of this writing, Lent will be here in less than a month. So what better time than now to rest and be joyful? What better time to refuse to give into the dreariness life brings? On the Roman Catholic calendar, we’re in one of two seasons called “Ordinary time.” Basically, this is the time of the year we go about our lives and what not. But to observe this as a season of rest and joy, maybe we can transform this from an ordinary season, to an extraordinary season.

Buffy vs Twilight in Buffy Season 8

I’ll be honest: I cannot stand sparkly vampires. I have even considered buying a T-shirt depicting Buffy dusting Edward. I have even contemplated writing fan fiction along the same lines. But why should I write fan fiction, when Buffy goes toe to toe with the Twilight Vamps canonically? In the Buffy the Vampire: Season 8 graphic novels, we find an interesting subtext involving the evils of even the nicest and incompetent vampires. This evil, is not just limited to the Buffyverse: Buffy the Vampire Slayer Season 8 shows that even the sparkly vamps of the twilight universe are evil creatures, and should probably be disposed of, lest they win the hearts of the innocents.

Let’s begin with issue 21: “Harmonic Divergence.” Harmony, the ditsy cheerleader turned Vampire Princess, is spotted in California drinking blood from the neck of an unnamed celebrity. Through a course of events, she gets her own reality show on MTV, and a worldwide interest in, and love for, vampires emerges. But Harmony as evil as ever, even more so. Not only does she heartlessly kills a slayer on live television, she also endorses a line of what is later revealed to be demon controlled toy vampires! Of course, after an attack by a would be slayer (who is slaughtered mercilessly), and after Buffy’s gang destroys the toys, Harmony plays the victim, and of course, the public fall for this. Hmmm, Vampires gaining immense popularity, to the point of immense fandom and said fans claiming said vampires are not evil. Quite an interesting resemblance to the fans of Twilight, as well as the other sparkly Vamps that have emerged because of the immense Twilight Vamps. Harmony appears nice enough, she’s not out to kill anyone – at least not publicly. But when the doors are closed, she’s just as bloodthirsty, heartless, and evil as ever. And perhaps, so are the Twilight Vamps. Perhaps.

Or perhaps I’m jumping to conclusions. Perhaps the similarity of Harmony’s popularity and Twilight’s popularity is simply just a coincidence and not an allegory showing that all Vampires are evil creatures  (even though issue 21 came out a mere two months after the release of the first Twilight movies). Well, even if this IS a coincidence, there are other damning factors against Twilight in season 8. For one thing, the Big Bad of season 8 is named, (ahem) TWILIGHT! Yes, how coincidental is that? How is it that the head evil creature is actually named Twilight? There’s no denying the fact that Season 8 shows the evils of the Twilight, when the main villain is actually named TWILIGHT!!! That’s would be like if CS Lewis had named Aslan “Jesus.” That would be like if George Orwell had called the pigs in Animal Farm “Communists.” That would be like if Herman Melville named the Whale – well whatever the heck the whale means, that one’s still up for debate. But my point is simple: Word association is a powerful tool. Its pretty unimaginable that Joss Whedon would happen to overlook the fact that his main villain in season 8 just happens to share the name of a series of books and movies which depicts good and caring vampires. When the name is different, any similarities, however blaring they might be, could be dismissed as merely coincidence. The very fact that the main villain is named “Twilight,” is a big blaring sign saying “HEY! LOOK! TWILIGHT! WE REALLY MEAN TWILIGHT!!!!”

Oh, but wait! What about Angel? What about Spike? They’re both Vampires and they’re both good!Or are they? If I remember correctly, Spike only became “good” because he had a chip implanted in his head causing him not to kill humans. Despite anything he did after that, if it had not been for that chip, Spike would have gone on killing anyone and everyone he felt the urge to kill. Spike was pretty much tamed like a circus animal – take out his metaphorical teeth and he’s harmless. Ok, ok, Spike is evil, but what about Angel? Well, Angel just happens to be the best piece of evidence to my thesis. Angel was probably one of the most evil Vampires in the Buffyverse before his, for lack of a better word, anti-curse. And after he slept with Buffy, he lost his soul and became evil once more. Angel is no (ahem) Angel; he’s a demon who is only good because people were so sick of his terror, that they decided to put a spell on him. But never mind that. an interesting fact was revealed about Angel recently. The writers of Buffy Season 8 has revealed that Angel, who has not previously been portrayed in season 8, has been in the background of Season 8 this entire time. Angel has been wearing a mask—the same mask that Twilight wears. Angel is Twilight! The kindest, most gentle, and dare I say Edward-like vampire in the Buffyverse turns out to be the Big Bad that’s trying to kill Buffy and the rest of the Scoobies! Case closed! Never mind the neon sign, we now have a blaring horn bleating out that even the sparkliest of vampires is evil and vile and will kill you if you give it a chance. And yes,I said  it! They are not people! They are evil THINGS that need to be disposed of properly and by all means necessary.

Oh the path we weave when we decide evil is good, and good is evil. Oh the twisted, sick perversions, oh the death and destruction – but I digress. In all seriousness, I really don’t believe Vampires exist, despite my enthusiasm in this article. Vampires are a great literary device to describe all that is evil and dark in this world. A little Vlad the Impaler, a little Black Plague, a little dark magic, and voila! Dracula – one of the most formidable literary villains of all time – is born. But even Dracula has his good side, right? He helped Buffy and the Scoobies in Tokyo, right? Well, yes….but only because that served his best interest. Mark my words, in any other circumstance, Dracula meeting Buffy would have meant a reenactment of Season 5’s first episode – only this time the end might depict a role reversal – IE Dracula standing over Buffy’s grave. Every vamp is something to be weary of. Like I said, I don’t believe in vampires – but if I ever meet one – I’m running the other way as fast as I possibly can. And you should as well. Now. Don’t stop. Just freaking run already!

Tweet, digg, et al...

A bit of housekeeping here. I’ve recently upgraded to Php V. 5. I don’t foresee any problems, but just a word of warning. IF you find a bug during this time, PLEASE contact me!!! PLEASE PLEASE! PLEASE!!! I’ll be checking in every so often, but the more eyes and ears I have, the better.

So, why am upgrading? First of all, why not? Kind of mad at my hosting service for not telling me this was available sooner, but that’s a different story. The reason I am upgrading is because I am adding the standard digg, facebook, tweet, et al buttons, and the plug in I’m going to use requires that I upgrade.  You’ll notice a twitter button already. This is actually temporary, a teaser if you will.

EDIT: The plug in has been activated. Still tweaking, but the buttons work.

In other news, I’m working on two new articles. Now, I just need to find the time to write them! Keep your eyes posted for those.

One last thing: My top 25 albums of the zeros post was linked to largehearted boy. Quite an interesting website focusing on literature, music, and pop culture (so kind of similar to this site).  Check it out if you feel like it.

Thanks for reading!

Aaron J. Edwards

10 albums of the ohs you may not have heard...

There are several albums that I treasure right now which only a few people seem to know about. Sure, if you’re a DJ or a music aficionado, you might know these albums, but for those of you who do not have the time or energy to search for lesser known bands and/or albums, I decided to put this little list together. So here’s 10 albums from the ohs that you may not have heard, but probably should hear (in no particular order):

  1. Immaculate Machine – Zeros and Ones (2005): The first time I heard this band, I had no expectations. They were the opening another band and I was late getting to the show. I walked in just as they started “Broken Ship” and couldn’t believe such a talented band was the opener. By the end of their set, I was in love with all things Immaculate Machine. From “Army’s” fight for artistic purity, to the stance against fear mongering in “Latest Breaking News,” power pop has never been so deep. Side note, you might recognize the female vocalist: she’s also with The New Pornographers and often times substitutes for Neko Case.
  2. Vienna Teng – Inland Territory (2009): If a folk singer and a classical composer were to have a kid, that kid would be Vienna Teng. Inland Territory, Vienna’s fourth studio album, may just be her best album yet. The songs are darker than those of her previous albums. For example, No Gringo talks about a future where Americans have to sneak into Mexico to survive:  Radio talks about a fictitious bombing in San Fransisco and the media’s 9/11-esque coverage. Inland Territory is not an album to listen to when you want to feel happy, but its a great album to listen to when you need a good cry, or just want to hear beautiful music.
  3. Black Kids – Partie Tramatic (2008): This album is just pure pop fun. But while its pop, its not, by any means, the crap you might hear on top 40 radio. Sure, there’s the crowd pleasing “I’m Not Gonna Teach Your Boyfriend How to Dance With You,” which sounds like it should be blaring from every American Eagle store in the country. But there’s also songs about people taking advantage of people, and how  deeply one night stands cut one’s soul. This album is for people who like to dance, but also like to think.
  4. The Violet Burning – I am a Stranger in this Place (2000): This is technically a best of album, but Micheal Pritzl decided, instead of repackaging these songs, re-record them all together – often time with a better feel than the original. The result is an amazingly dark and hauntingly beautiful album. Perfect for playing on a cold, rainy night.
  5. Beirut – The Flying Club (2007): I first heard this album played in a coffee shop, and knew I had to have it. One gets the feeling of walking along a quiet street in the middle of Paris when listening to The Flying Club. The songs are light, but beautiful. Free, but full of meaning. As someone with a BA in English, I have to admire the poetic feel of the lyrics. Try not to smile too much while listening to this album.
  6. Dressy Bessy – Sound Go Round (2002): I bought this album the day after a family friend died, so its always had some dark overtones to it. But despite the dark overtones I’ve laid on Sound Go Round, this album is pure sunshine wrapped in a fuzzy blanket of bliss.  There’s an interesting juxtaposition in the songs “I Saw Cinnamon” and “Buttercups.” In “I Saw Cinnamon,” we get the story of a free spirited man whom everyone likes. In “Buttercups,” however, we get the story of a woman who does her own thing despite the people around her – those around her finally give up on trying to change her, and even “Clap for her.”
  7. Treaspassers William – Having (2006): Another dark and beautiful album from Treasspassers William. The songs on Having feel like they’re longing for the safety and innocence one finds at home. On a side note, fans of Mercury Rev might be pleased to hear that Dave Fridmann produced this album.
  8. The 1900s – Cold and Kind (2007): I discovered this band quite by accident. I walked into their show during Musicfest NW (2008) to see a friend and had no real plans of staying. But as the 1900s started playing, I knew I HAD to listen to the entire set. When I got home, I downloaded Cold & Kind and played it so much, 4 of the 12 tracks are still in my “100 most played songs” Itunes playlist. The music is often light, with a 1970s pop feel, but the lyrics are anything but light. The lyrics talk about such hard subjects as choosing to spend their life single (as opposed to being with the wrong person), to throwing away one’s set of values to pursue what they really believe.
  9. Menomena – Friend and Foe (2007): Those of you who read my Top 25 albums of the zeros album may recognize this band’s name; Menomena’s first album was actually my number 3 pick of the decade. The second (proper) studio release was a great follow up to I am the Fun Blame Monster. When one looks at this album’s cover, one gets a surrealistic feeling – The lyrics and music of Friend and Foe follow through with their own surreal flavor. The entire album feels like a restful dream.
  10. Havalina – Space, Love, & Bullfighting (2002): This album is almost sad, in the fact that it is the last album Havalinia (Rail Company) ever put out, and was sort of a last ditch effort to keep the band together after several members left. Despite these factors, Space, Love, & Bullfighting is a wonderful and smart piece of music. Havalina is known for doing themed albums, but this is the first album where the band merges two unrelated themes (Latin America and the Space Age). This merging makes a very eccentric album of course, but despite the eccentricity of the album, the songs are all very accessible – not to mention just a lot of fun.

Top 5 soundtracks of the ohs!

I was not going to do this list, but its pretty much writing itself in my head anyways. Besides, there were so many great soundtracks this decade, I almost HAD to write this list. So without further Adieu, I give you the top five soundtracks of the ohs!

5. Team America: World Police (Film – 2004) : OK. This film is rude, crude, and at the very least, NSFW. But it is also funny as heck. And the soundtrack was done so well! Who could forget classics like “Freedom isn’t Free” and “Montage?” Not to mention the anthem of patriotism that is the song, “America! —- Yeah!” But as funny as the soundtrack is, what made this soundtrack great was the fact that when it (and the movie) was made, we were (and are still) in the midst of a war that doesn’t seem to have an end. It was a time of extreme patriotism at the expense of those of us who dared question why. Team America: World Police dared lampoon these political zealots, as well as those who stood blindly to oppose them (ie the Film Actor’s Guild). This soundtrack and movie was an expression in free speech. I dare say the creators have indeed, with the making of this great piece of art, put in their buck oh five (cause freedom costs a buck oh five).

4. Spamalot (Stage – 2004): As I type this, I have the song “Run away!” going through my head. Spamalot was based on the classic movie, Monty Python and the Holy Grail.  I dare say, the producers found the one thing missing from the film: MUSIC!  “The Song that Goes Like This” lampoons the cheesy hit song that is inevitably in every serious Broadway production. “Find Your Grail,” while comedic in nature, has a good point – one should indeed search for their “Grail.” And who could forget (ahem – sings in my best voice),  all for one, two for all, four for some, and three for all. So bring out your dead and always look on the bright side of life! Even if you’re not yet dead – or wed.

3. Avenue Q (Stage – 2003): One of these days I might actually get to see this show live (as opposed to the crappy video floating around on youtube), but for now, I have this marvelous soundtrack. And what a soundtrack! I’ve often asked myself  “What Do you do with a BA in English?” I’ve often wished I could go back to college, and I find myself singing “It Sucks to be Me” on a regular basis.  I’m pretty impressed the writers of Avenue Q throw political correctness out the window with “Every One’s a Little Bit Racist.” And “Schadenfreude?” Well, that just makes me laugh.  The Avenue Q soundtrack is not safe for work by any means, but I find myself playing it at work on a regular basis anyways.  Avenue Q may not be the best for those who are offended easily, but it has more than its fair share of valid points.  One has to wonder what the Avenue Q soundtrack would have been like if it had been a television series – somehow I don’t think it would be the same.

2. Dr Horrible’s Sing-a-long Blog (Internet / DVD – 2008): If you haven’t seen this yet, go to Hulu right now and watch it. OK? Watch it? Good. Wasn’t that amazing? And what about the music? A high point on the album (and the video itself), is the song “A Man’s gotta do,” which outlines a pivotal scene in song. The scatting in the second chorus between Penny, Dr Horrible, and Captain Hammer is probably my favorite part of the entire video (the remote control is in my hands! Balls!).  That’s what makes this soundtrack so great – the music is not there for the music’s sake – the music is part of the plot. If you took the music out of the production, there would be no storyline.  If this is what happens when writer’s go on strike, maybe writers should go on strike more often!

1.  A Mighty Wind (Film – 2003): The soundtrack for “A Mighty Wind” did something different than any other soundtrack mentioned on this list: A Mighty Wind’s soundtrack included songs not in the movie. One notable instance is the Folksmen covering “Start Me Up” by the Rolling Stones.  They take a traditional sex, drugs, and rock and roll song, and make it a folk song. Quite intriguing actually. And while the soundtrack features other instances of songs not mentioned in the movie, one can also judge between the “toothpaste commercial” New Main Street Singers version of “Never Did No Wandering,” or the Folksmen version which is musically truer to the lyrics. On a side note, if you have not seen this film, you should! The soundtrack is the best of the Ohs, but the movie itself is the best mocumentary of the ohs. I could think of far worst things to do with an hour and a half.

Top 25 albums of the zeros!

25. Sigur Rós – Takk…  (2005): Ah, what would we do without Sigur Rós? Of course, the lyrics would mean more to me if I could actually speak Icelandic, but one gets the general idea even without the lyrics. I guess that’s what makes Sigur Rós such a wonderful band – their music transcend the language barrier. Of course, knowing that they write the original melody in a made up language called “hopelandic” and add real lyrics sure helps one find an interpretation.

24. The Flaming Lips – At War with the Mystics (2006): The first time I heard “The W.A.N.D.”, I knew I wanted more of this album. At War with the Mystics might not get the love that “Yoshima Battles the Pink Robots,” has been getting, but its probably the most accessible album The Flaming Lips has ever done. At any rate, how can one pass up ANY album by one of the greatest rock bands of the last twenty years?

23. Andrew Bird & the Mysterious Production of Eggs (2005): Mr. Bird’s second solo album is also his best. From Opposite Day’s karmatic approach on the world, to Nervous Tic’s painting of two different people’s lives, this album has some of the most brilliant lyrics of the decade. And Mr Bird’s whistling! Don’t forget about his whistling!

22. Blitzen Trapper – Furr (2008): I have a theory on this album: every song has something to do with dreams. Some songs are dreams, some song reference dreams, some songs talk about dreams. Even if my theory is wrong, every song makes me fish for meaning, and that’s always a good thing. And the 1970s flare of the album always puts me in a good mood.

21. Jenny Lewis (with The Watson Twins) – Rabbit Fur Coat (2006): Jenny Lewis is no longer starring in Toys R Us commercials, and that’s a good thing! Her first album away from Rilo Kiley explores spirituality, poverty, and even corrupt politicians. Backed by the beautiful harmonizing of The Watson Twins, this album is candy for the ears. And probably the best cover of the decade (Handle me With Care by the Traveling Willburies) is on this album.

20. Ben Folds – Rockin’ the Suburbs (2001): Ben Folds lost the other two members of the Ben Folds Five, and produced this amazing and fun album. The title track is hysterical, telling the story of a white kid from the suburbs and how rough his life is. But the album is not all light fun; “Zak and Sara” tells a story of a couple just trying to make it, “The Ascent of Stan” tells a tale of a hippie who sells out his beliefs, and “Fired” tells the story of an abusive workplace (probably run by Stan actually).

19. Air – Talkie Walkie (2004): The first time I heard “Cherry Blossom Girl,” I kind of fell in love. That sounds like a Cliche’, but its really the truth.  A month later, I bought the entire album. While the other songs didn’t quite hit me like Cherry Blossom Girl, my first exposure to Air was more than pleasant. Air: they named their band well. We all need a little Air to live.

18. Rilo Kiley – Take Offs and Landings (2001): Depending on who you ask, this was Rilo Kiley’s first or second album (I say second). To me, Rilo Kiley was a defining band in the early and mid zeros. I remember one college paper that was written in its entirety while listening to this album. Of course, there’s also a negative memory- a girl actually quoted “Science vs Romance” to me as a reason we shouldn’t date….but that’s a different story altogether! And I do have to admit, she was right!

17. The Decemberists – The Hazards of Love (2009): When making this list, I knew I had to include this album. To be honest, I’m still digesting it as a whole – and I’ve had it since February of this year (2009). I am actually surprised it took The Decemberists this long to do a rock opera, considering their albums are always equal parts literature and music, but The Hazards of Love was worth the wait.

16. Daft Punk – Human After All (2005): Ahhh, funky dance music – how could I live without you? But there’s more than just funky dance music, there’s a running theme in this album about television as well as consumerism. Your feet and your mind will love this album equally.

15. Elvis Costello – North (2003): This is a great album to listen to on a cold, rainy night or a walk in the snow. Probably the only non-Christmastime album I associate with winter. Its not a typical Elvis Costello album – pretty much piano driven, slow Jazz – but that’s what makes this such a magnificent album.

14. Blonde Redhead – Misery is a Butterfly (2004): From Elephant Woman to Falling man, this album is everything I love about Blonde Redhead. When they stop playing music as a band, I’m sure I’ll look back at this album and see it as their masterpiece. Well, maybe – they might have a few good albums left in them still.

13. Ladytron – Light & Magic (2003): I bought this album as soon as I saw it was available. I didn’t even listen to any tracks on the album – just picked it off the rack, brought it to the counter, and paid for it. Ladytron’s sophomore release did not disappoint. The songs are full of metaphors that I’m still trying to unwrap six years later. And one of these years I’ll find a translation to the songs sung in Bulgarian.

12. Over The Rhine – Ohio (2003): This album was originally supposed to be two albums, but the band couldn’t stand to separate the songs from one another, so they released this masterpiece of a double album. At times Ohio’s songs are minimal and naked, at times they are fully orchestrated. At times Ohio explores personal hardships and spirituality, at times, the songs are outright political. If you can find it, be sure to check out the extended version of “How Long Have You Been Stoned.”

11. The New Pornographers – Twin Cinema (2005): The New Pornographers are my favorite band, so of course they would get a mention on this list. Twin Cinema is somewhat of a departure from a simple rock and roll to more of an album rock sound. The band also grew in the literal sense with the addition of keyboardists / Vocalist Kathryn Calder.  And what other band can write a song full of lyrics that don’t really make any sense and make it sound like an epic journey?

10. The Polyphonic Spree – The Fragile Army (2007): This is the album I always pull out when I’m feeling down and want to cheer myself up. While a 20+ member band cannot really be described as “scaled down” in any sense, The Fragile Army seems to be the most “scaled down” of The Spree’s albums. The songs feel more accessible and while the songs still work as pieces to a whole album, almost all of them work individually – which is a change of focus for The Spree. Next time you feel like curling up with a blanket and sobbing into a pillow, pull up the video for “We Crawl” and try not to smile just a little.

9. Rufus Wainwright – Want One (2003): I like to think of this album as a musical blog: Wainwright seems to write about random experiences from dancing at a club, hoping someone special will call and “Vibrate” his phone, to hitting on someone (and getting shot down) on a train. Every time I wake up at 11:11, I must quote the song of the same name. Though I have to change the lyrics, because I usually AM in Portland (the lyrics state he is NOT in Portland – or Heaven).

8. Belle & Sebastian – Dear Catastrophe Waitress (2003): I picked this album up during a time when everything in my life was changing. The album provided much needed solace to me in a very shaky time. Now that things have changed a few more times, and I’m generally on the upside, this album still provides me with a smile when I hear it. Maybe its the lyrics, maybe its the music, or maybe I’m just a sucker for any band that likes to give their albums a 60s and 70s feel.

7. The Shins – Oh, Inverted World (2001): There’s a reason this album had two tracks on the Garden State Soundtrack, as well as an in Movie shout out by Natalie Portman. Yes, this band WILL change your life – but you probably knew that already. This band has gotten so much positive press that its hard not to know this band. But in case you haven’t heard it, go listen to it already! Jeez! WHAT ARE YOU WAITING FOR!?!?!?!?

6. U2 – All That You Can’t Leave Behind (2000): No, this was not the Joshua Tree come again, but All that you Can’t Leave Behind is one of the best albums U2 has done to date – I would rank it number four. Sure, its got the crowd pleasing (and thus overplayed) “Elevation,” but its also got so many overlooked songs: Wild Honey, New York, Kite. Grace. There really isn’t a bad song on this album.

5. Ladytron – 604 (2001): Ladytron’s first full length album is often described as “what 1980s futurists believed music in 2000 would sound like.”  While I’m glad not all music sounds this way, I am also glad 604 sounds the way it does. 604 is probably the best, and most important electronic pop album since Kraftwerk’s “Die Mensch-Maschine.” I’m still waiting for an interpretation to the songs done in Bulgarian though!

4. Sufjan Stevens – Come on, Feel the Illinoise (2005): This is probably the most obscure album on this list (sarcasm tag).  I think Paste (do they matter anymore?) rated this as the best album of the decade. While I don’t quite agree with Paste, Illinoise is indeed one of the most ambitious pieces of music I’ve listened to in a very long time and is probably in my top twenty all time favorite albums. Now, will Sufjan ever continue with his 50 states album project. or was that really a joke? Come on Sufjan, feel the Oregon already! That didn’t quite sound right.

3. Menomena – I am the Fun Blame Monster (2003): Menomena is my favorite local band, and one of my favorite bands altogether. When this album finally came out, I already knew all the songs by heart (I saw them several times in early 2003). They also get the award for best packaging ever. The CD booklet was actually an 80 page flipbook and was hand assembled by band members. If you can, get a hold of the song “stability” and compare it to the album version (E is Stable).

2. The New Pornographers – Mass Romantic (2000): Some might not actually consider this album to be eligible for a best of the zeros list, considering the first songs were recorded in 1998, but the album release date says 2000, so that’s good enough for me. And besides, how could I not include my favorite band’s debut album? The best song on the album,”Letter from an Occupant” is really a show of all the band’s talents, but do not stop there! Even if you’re just a Neko fan and not a New Pornographers fan, listen to the entire album! If you can, find the Japanese version which features a cover of Donner Party’s “When I was a Baby.”

1. The Arcade Fire – Funeral (2004): Again,an album that has plenty of good press – but the Arcade Fire deserves all the good press they get and more! Every single song on this album is amazing: From Wake up, to Rebellion (lies), to the four “Neighborhood” songs, to Haiti, to…you get the point. The Arcade Fire is one of those bands that puts good use off the talent they have. I think most of the band members must play an average of two instruments on any given song. For an extra treat, watch this video of The Arcade Fire doing “Wake Up” with David Bowie.

A decade long trek...

I’m in the preparation stage for writing my best albums of the decade post(s). Its quite a  daunting task, because there is a LOT of music from the zeros(or whatever we’re calling this decade) in my music collection – more so than any other decade. Part of it is because not every album I’ve owned from previous decades is in a playable format; many of my CDs have been lost or damaged, and I really don’t have many cassette tapes left. Part of it is because I have more disposable income, and thus tend to buy more albums. But part of it is simply there is more accessibility to music this decade than there has been in past decades.

I remember in 2001, as a third year student at PSU, I discovered MP3.com. With a few searches, I was able to find so many artists. These artists did not necessarily have a label, or in some cases, even an album, but they had mp3s up for grabs.  I still listen to many of these mp3s today, though I’ve lost a few in the inevitable switching from one computer to another. Adding to the online accessibility equation, there was (and is), of course, the wave of P2P applications that have made it easier to find music; Napster, Kazaa, Soulseek, and Bit torrent clients have all found their ways onto my hard drive over the last ten years. And of course payed services such as Itunes and Emusic have played a part in my musical consumption. Its so much easier to read an album review at midnight in my pajamas, listen to a thirty second snippet of a song, and then download said song – perhaps even the entire album, than it is to read said review and wait till the next day to go to the record store. That is assuming that one remembers to do so.

But websites, P2Ps, and online music stores are not the only thing that’s made music more accessible in the last ten years; podcasts and Internet radio have played a vital role in finding new music as well. No longer are we a slave to whatever crap our local stations insist on playing. If we don’t like what the Portland stations are playing, we can check out what Seattle or New York or Los Angeles or Denver or London or Singapore and etcetera is playing. We can listen to almost any radio station in the world now. And of course, there are podcasts from both professional DJs, and amateur DJs from all over the world.  Its fairly common for me to listen to a podcast and end up downloading a quarter of the songs played on said podcast.

While accessibility has played a major part in the music of the last decade, there are simply more bands producing music right now. Any garage band can record their music and upload it to the Internet without having to have a record company. And sure, record companies help, but they’re not necessary. Clap Your Hands, Say Yeah produced and distributed their first album without the help of a record company. This could not have happened before this decade. Sure, the early 90s saw a surge of garage bands make it big, and everyone started wondering how to find these garage bands – but that was the problem, no one knew where to look because these garage bands, if they were able to afford to make a recording, could only afford to make a limited number of CDs. Its just easier to market yourself online, then it is to play a dozen or so shows around the city and hope that you develop a following.

It truly has been a noteworthy decade as far as music is concerned. It makes me wonder what the next ten years will bring. Some of my favorite artists did not exist until this decade. Other bands that I’ve loved all through the 90s, and even into the 80s, decided to call it quits in the zeros. What bands will emerge in the teens, and what bands will call it quits? What technologies will emerge? What technologies will become obsolete? In ten years will we mock the Ipod like we mock the cassette tape now? And will my musical tastes be different in 2019? They certainly are not the same as they were in 1999. Only time will tell on any of these questions, but I suspect the teens will show us all a lot of music. Look out for my top albums of the zeros in a week or so, as well as one or two other best of the decade lists.

The almost too good to be true message of the gospel...

About ten years ago I took the song “Jesus is the answer,” and changed the lyrics. For those of you who do not know the song, the original lyrics were:

Jesus is the answer for the world today
Above him there’s no other Jesus is the way
Jesus is the answer for the world today
Above him there’s no other Jesus is the way

If you really want to hear the music and harmony, I’m sure a quick Google will satisfy your curiosity, but the music was very reminiscent of a 1980s Coke commercial.  The song  sounded more like “I’d Like to Buy the World a Coke,” than a song of praise and admiration to God. Well, being the snide and troublesome person I am, I rewrote the lyrics:

Jesus is not soda, Jesus is not Pop
He’s not Pepsi-cola, he’s not 7-up
Jesus is not root beer, Coke , or RC
Jesus is not Soda, loaded with caffeine

I’ll admit, probably not the most Christ like thing to do, and my apologies to the author of the song, but dang it! A worship song should not sound like a soda commercial! I really felt (and still feel) bugged that the song sounds like a jingle, because a jingle’s job is to sell and advertise a product.  Christianity is not a product and it is not something you “sell.” We’re not a bunch of snake oil salesmen, and we’re not trying to make a profit (OK, some of us aren’t – but that’s a different subject).

I work two jobs in television. Because of confidentiality and professionalism, I won’t mention any names, but I can tell you one of my jobs has a lot of religious programing.  I was sitting in master control not too long ago when I hear an announcer say:

The almost too good to be true message of the gospel

Maybe I’m just cynical, but the way he said this made him sound like he was on late night television trying to be the next Tony Robbins (or at the very least,  Billy Mays’ replacement). Granted, the context the announcer said this in was indeed trying to sell something (a CD of a message), but Come on! Firstly, the gospel is NOT “too good to be true.” It is not even “almost too good to be true.” The Gospel IS truth – but that’s besides the point.  Why do we feel the need to sell the Gospel? Why do we write songs that sound like soda jingles to present the message of Christ? Why do we insist on using late night infomercial sales theory? I realize that things have changed since the first century AD, but I really doubt  Peter and Paul had an advertising budget, and they seemed to do just fine without one!

I’ll stop here, because I feel like I’m going into a rant, but I must say something in closing. Instead of buzz words and jingles, how about we rely on the strength of our message? I’m sure the author of “Jesus is the Answer” and the anouncer on the unamed religious program had all the best intentions, but instead of trying to sell the Gospel like soda, money making schemes, or shamwows,  how about we show what the Gospel does to our lives instead?

How (not) to form a charity supergroup.

As someone who grew up in the 1980s, I was exposed to many charity supergroups and the songs they produced. Yes, such classics as “We are the World,” “That’s What Friends are For,” and “Do They Know its Christmas” are all part of my childhood – not to mention a few Christian charity supergroups. But Christian or “Secular,” charity soupergroup songs were cheesy, at times unlistenable, but still fond memories. And they laid the groundwork for modern charity supergroups. Two in particular have caught my attention, but for different reasons. In 2005, The North American Hallowe’en Prevention Initiative (NAHPI) recorded “Do They Know its Halloween?” A few months ago the song “Beds are Burning” was re-recorded by a group of international celebrities put together by the organization Tck tck tck. Like I said, the two songs have caught my attention for two different reasons: While NAHPIs song was probably my favorite charity supergroup song of all time, Tck tck tck’s attempt was an exercise in charity supergroup failure.

NAHPI did almost everything right. They never took themselves too seriously, knowing that previous charity supergroups have been parodied beyond measure. In fact, “Do They Know its Halloween” is a direct parody of “Do They know its Christmas.” While the song’s proceeds go to benefit UNICEF, the song “stems from a frustration with other benefit songs’ misguided, somewhat patronizing attitude, and Western-centric worldview.”  For their celebrity roster, they kept it pretty low key – mostly indie rockers. The most notable people involved in the song are Beck, Feist, Win and Régine (The Arcade Fire), David Cross, and Elvira (it is a Halloween song after all).  The song itself was extremely humorous, and the video even more so. Ghosts with zipper mouths, David Cross yelling about cute Kitten calendars, and even a giant pumpkin moving down the streets, eager to destroy anyone fool enough not to take cover. Do They Know its Halloween is indeed a great song. In fact, its become a cherished tradition of mine to listen to this song over and over on Halloween.

While the NAHPI song was creative, intelligence, and humorous, the Tck tck tck song was – well, not. I found this “gem” on Itunes for free a while back. As I said, I grew up in the 1980’s, so I was very excited to see a cover of the classic Midnight Oil song. Having said this, I must wonder WHAT THE HECK WERE THEY THINKING!?!?!?!?! Yes, Climate change is a pressing issue, and while I will not debate the arguments for or against climate change,  but I will say I wish I could undownload this song! And its not just because its a bad song, its because downloading this song off Itunes and other services is an automatic signature to a petition that will be presented at the conference demanding “climate justice now.” This was not stated anywhere when I hit “download.” In a sense, they tricked me into signing their petition. Like I said, I am not going to debate for or against climate change, but I am against anyone who is so desperate for names on thier petition that they are not up front what you are “signing.” It makes me question the organization as a whole, and I have to wonder what they’re trying to sneak into their initiatives.

But I digress. Even if they were honest about why they want people to download their song, one has to wonder still, what the heck were they thinking? Firstly, they were too lazy to write a new song. This is a group of so called artists from around the world, and all they can do is remake a 20 year old song? Can they not use all their alleged musical talent to write a new song? The only good excuse I can think of for using an old song is that its “recycling.” But even if they used Beds are Burning to present an “eco-friendly” model, they could have at LEAST been creative with the lyrics they changed. Instead, you get a song that’s preachy, stuffy, and bland. As far as the “artists,” there’s a few A listers: Fergie (who has the talent and brains of a peanut), and Lily Allen(yawn). They use several international artists (probably the only thing that makes sense about this song, considering its a worldwide conference), a bunch of has beens (Scorpions, Duran Duran, and Midnight Oil), and several top 40 soon to be has been pre-teen rock bands. There’s also an intro statement by Kofi Annan and an ending statement by Desmond Tutu.  All in all, Beds are Burning is about the most boring charity supergroup song since Dionne Warwick and friends did “That’s what Friends are For.”

Charity supergroups are often times composed of hypocrites. After Band-Aid, most of the artists walked away and did  nothing else (one notable exception is Bono, who stayed in Africa for two weeks afterwards). Most of the celebrities involved in Beds are Burning probably really support the initiatives put out by Tck tck tck, but are they willing to do their part? I would love to see a list of their carbon footprints. Both Fergie and Lily Allen tour on a regular basis. Are their tour buses and jets fueled by bio-diesel? Or do they put out a smog cloud the size of LA every time they tour?  Its easy to get in front of a mic and say they support something, but one cannot expect others to change if one does not first change themselves. Perhaps that’s another factor that made NAHPI such a great charity supergroup. They saw something that bugged them, ie the fact that most charity supergroups were patronizing and Western-centric, and they used their creative talents to do something about it! The money they raised for UNICEF was just the icing on the cake.

Oh dear, the Hulk's mad! What do we do?

The Hulk is unstoppable. When he gets mad, he goes on a rampage. He’s destroyed Las Vegas, conquered a foreign planet, and brought an invading fleet of aliens to destroy Earth – all because someone ticked him off. And trying to stop him? Well, good luck with that! But there are a few people who might be able to stop him. So who are these brave candidates? Who can send the Hulk away with his tale between his legs? Who is our only hope if the Hulk decides to go nuclear once more?

Let’s start with Mr Rogers. Yes, yes I said Mr freaking Rogers of the kids TV show. No, its not his arsenal of nuclear sweaters that will make the Hulk run home to his mommy. Mr Rogers can possibly beat the Hulk because of one main consideration: Mr Rogers defeated everyone in Lemon Demon’s “The Ultimate Showdown of Ultimate Destiny.” But wait, the Hulk wasn’t in that! No, true, the Hulk was not in that specific song, but Doc Octopus from the Marvel Universe was, therefore it is indeed possible that the entire Marvel Universe was involved. Still, its possible the entire Marvel Universe was not involved. If that’s the case, well sorry Mr Rogers, but I don’t think you’re going to be able to wear a sweater again.

Our next candidate is Black Canary from the DC Universe. For clarification sake, I am talking about Dinah Laurel Lance, not Dinah Drake. The reason that it is possible for Black Canary to best the Hulk is because of her Sonic Cry. Said cry can pretty much knock anyone down, and she has the Martial Arts skills to beat the Hulk up while he’s down. Still, there’s no guarantee that her cry could indeed knock the Hulk down, so if she were to try, well, the Hulk might just have roasted Canary for dinner.

A third, and probably most likely candidate to best the Hulk is Superman. Ah yes, the man of steel. Nothing short of Kryptonite itself can keep Superman down. In fact, Superman DID beat the Hulk. Yes, in DC vs Marvel, Superman beat the Hulk! Still, there is the fact that the Hulk had no real motivation for beating Superman. The Hulk was not mad at Superman. The Hulk was matched against Superman by the two squabbling brothers. If Superman had, say, launched the Hulk into outer space, THEN the battle of Superman vs The Hulk might just have gone another way! Yes, if that were the situation, the best that Superman could hope to achieve is a stalemate. All of Earth destroyed, while the two indestructibles battle it out with each other. And that would be too much for Superman’s conscious, so Superman, in order to save the rest of the Earth, would indeed concede to the Hulk.

So how about someone from the Marvel Universe itself? There’s the Scarlett Witch, who has the ability to change reality. Certainly someone who almost wipes out the entire Mutant race because of a nervous breakdown could take down one measly, over-radiated man. Or what about Domino? She’s got the mutant power to manipulate chance into her favor. She could probably (see?) manipulate the situation to her favor and defeat the Hulk. Ok, let’s stop right there. Both these characters are in the Marvel Universe along with the Hulk. If there was indeed a chance that either character were to beat the Hulk, I think they would have already done it! Instead, they both sit around, powerless, when the Hulk goes on a murderous rampage and threatens to destroy the Earth. Instead, the only way the Hulk can be defeated is for Tony Stark to calmly tell the Hulk the truth while trying not to wet himself as the Hulk ponders whether or not to rip Tony’s head off.

Ok, so who can beat the Hulk then? Anyone? Well, yes. The winner is: THE POWERPUFF GIRLS!!! Specifically Bubbles. Yes, of all the superheroes in all the universe, she is our only hope. Why? The Hulk is powered by his anger. His strength grows as his rage grows. What’s going to make the Hulk mad? Well, someone trying to pound the snot out of him for one thing. But that’s not the direction Bubbles would take. Bubbles would give the Hulk flowers and sing pretty songs to him. Maybe make a cup of hot tea and set him down and give him a hug. Yes, the Hulk could not stand against Bubbles, because by the time Bubbles was through with the Hulk, he would be Bruce Banner once more. And she’s tough too, so she could take being tossed across the room a few times while she’s trying to calm him down.

So lesson learned! If there’s a rift in the time-space contium and the Hulk pops out of universe 616, all we have to do is figure out what universe The Powerpuff Girls live in, and volia! Bubbles to the rescue! Of course, what if we can’t find Bubbles in time? My best advice is hide in a cave in the middle of nowhere. Cause the Hulk is mad, and he’s going to mess us all up!